Royal Revival – How King Kenny Can Turn Things Around

Kenny Dalglish SO KENNY Dalglish is in the hot-seat at Anfield but, as the start he’s made has shown, the appointment of the club’s messiah to the top job hasn’t yielded instant results. Anyone who’s watched Liverpool regularly this campaign will tell you that not even the mystical powers of King Kenny are enough on their own to turn this wretched season around. So what does Kenny have to do in order to bring some respectability back to Anfield and ensure that he’s in with a fighting chance of nabbing the job long-term when decisions are made in the summer? Continue reading →

Ranty Cause: Keane to Prove His Net Worth

robbie keane nets HE’S THE love-hate figure of the Irish national team. We love him because he’s our captain, our record goal-scorer, a genuinely decent skin, and hope that we can all pull a smoking-hot bird. But we hate him for his histrionics on the football pitch, his flailing arms, his sometimes glaring misses, and the fact that he hasn’t turned into the consistent sharp-shooter he promised in his youth. Continue reading →

Ronaldinho Seeks Rio Redemption

rio flamengo PORTO Alegre is known as “Cidade Sorriso” or Smile City. It’s appropriate then, that it should export the most famous buck-toothed grin in world football. An odyssey that traversed three of Europe’s most renowned cities came full circle this week whenRonaldo de Assis Moreira returned to his homeland, though this time to the sprawling mass of Rio de Janeiro and the fanatical following of Flamengo. Continue reading →

On The Road To God Knows Where – Paris

paris tunnel WE’LL always have Paris ….It’s the beginning of a new year and it’s a massive one for Giovanni Trapattoni and Ireland. Euro qualification lies in the balance. This time 12 months ago, the pain of Paris was all too palatable. We’d do well to remember it as we now look to get over the finish line. Póg Mo Goal returns to that fateful night and journeys with the fans. Those with a weak disposition, look away now. Continue reading →

Spud Watch – The Irish Abroad 07.01.11

seamus-coleman v spurs SPUD Watch becomes a normal job again as I actually have players to report on. I felt like Lieutenant Huxley in Demolition Man there for a while, wandering around yearning for things to happen – usually in the Npower Championship but in the end I’d end up on Chat Roulette crying at a group of black people wearing Yankee jerseys in America laughing at my naked body. Continue reading →

Red Man Walking: Who’ll be next in the Anfield Hot Seat?

Roy-Hodgson-Liverpool WITH Wednesday night’s feeble defeat to Blackburn representing a new low in Roy Hodgson’s brief period in charge at Liverpool , the feeling is that NESV have lost faith in the 63 year old and are actively seeking a replacement. Based on what the New England owners have done with the Boston Red Sox, failure isn’t tolerated for long. We look at the potential candidates to replace Roy and assess each of their chances of actually pitching up at Anfield. Continue reading →

Spud Watch – The Irish Abroad 14.12.10

Stephen-Hunt-Stephen-Carr-007 I FEEL sad my friends. I feel very sad. I can’t shake this melancholy. Another pitiful weekend for our lads over in foreign. There is going to be a serious amount of Irish players moving in the January transfer window, the type of movement not seen since the time I licked a raw chicken fillet when I was 5 years old. Continue reading →

The Bacon Slicer: The Things I Love About Football

zidane 1 TONIGHT Matthew I am going to be writing about football. Chances are that if you are one of the five people who will read this piece (and yes I am bitter considering I am spending my Friday night writing this when I could be drinking tea and swooning over the Take That lads on The Late Late with Kilkenny hurler Brian Hogan-look-a-like Ryan Tubridy), then you love football too. My own girlfriend won’t even read it – subtle way of slipping in that I have a girlfriend! Continue reading →

Joxer Goes to Doha; World Cup Heads to the Middle East.

blatter qatar QATAR is the Athlone of the world. To the east; the bustling mass of the Asian economies (aka Dublin); to the west, the mix of cultures, tradition, and trendiness of Europe (Galway). Yet just as the ramshackle St. Mel’s Park football grounds was replaced with the Athlone Town stadium, the Arab state boasts a growing network of state-of-the art sports facilities and, after today’s announcement in Zurich, the world is invited to play ball here in 2022. Continue reading →

Spud Watch – The Irish Abroad 23.11.10

Soccer - Barclays Premier League - Fulham v Manchester City - Craven Cottage JOE Hart wasn’t injured after all and Shay Given returned to the bad place he’s been in now for months, despite Wednesday’s brief international respite; like a prisoner being let out for Christmas dinner. Damien Duff is, in my opinion, also about to enter a bad place. He looked out of sorts again against City – getting subbed for Gera and may now be in danger of losing his place for their next outing. What are we without a Duff firing on all cylinders? It’s like The Beatles without John and Paul, Ant and Dec without Dec, porn without the cum-shot, Play The Game without Derek Davis – It doesn’t bare thinking about. Continue reading →

State of Play: Ireland 1 Norway 2

Ireland Norway SHAY Given must have had a spring in his step before kick-off with the news that Joe Hart is out for a few weeks. He probably could have made a better wall for the free-kick or maybe positioned himself better but he made some very good instinctive stops and who am I to question the best goalie in the world who, hopefully, will get a chance to make Mancini see sense and get the respect that he has earned over the years in return. Continue reading →

Spud Watch – The Irish Abroad 16.11.10

Kevin Foley Wolves SEAMUS Coleman is rapidly becoming a right-sided Gareth Bale under our eyes. When you consider that this time last year, Bale was still a struggling left-back and you look where he’s at now. Coleman is already far from a struggling defender and was a real handful for the Arse in the first half, creating chances and space through acceleration, flat-out pace, decent control and the ability to make a pass. Continue reading →

Aviva La Revolution, Cup Can Save Irish Soccer

aviva1-390x285 COULD the FAI Cup prove to be the saviour of Irish soccer? With the largest crowd in four decades, over 36,000, flocking to the Aviva Stadium last weekend, there followed a spectacle to enthrall the masses. And now a seed has been sown that the domestic game could achieve what is has always threatened, to capture the hearts and minds of the public. Continue reading →

Spud Watch – The Irish Abroad 09.11.10

damien-duff DAMIEN Duff finally returned to first team action for Fulham. Hurrah – He came on along with Stephen Kelly as Mark Hughes’ side searched for an equaliser against Aston Villa. Why he decided to play Duff at left back is a mystery to me. I hope this isn’t a sign of things to come for Hughes as it was this kind of shite that made Duff’s career go backwards at Newcastle, not to mention getting injured every second week. Continue reading →

Passage of Play: Robert Rich

bedlington fans “I want to help Bedlington Terriers. I’m still learning about British football, and I understand that if they do well on the field it can move up in divisions. If this is the dream the community has, I want to help. I don’t want to become an owner – I just want to help.” Continue reading →