Good On Paper: End of the World for England

THE fall-out continues over the decision to award the World Cup Finals to Russia and Qatar and the English smell a FIFA-sized rat.

Everyone is in the line of fire, from Becks, to the BBC, FIFA, and Sepp Blatter.

As you would expect from those stalwarts of objective journalism, the British rags have been understated in their response.

The Mirror’s front page: “Russia, a Mafia state rotten to core with corruptions. Qatar, a medieval kingdom with no freedom of speech. Both are swimming in oil money. How on earth did they persuade the dodgy fat cats of FIFA to give them the World Cup?”

Remember, the English were spitting bile during the bidding process when the Russians were less than complimentary about their rival.

The English 2018 team lodged an offical complaint after Russian Chief Executive Alexei Sorokin was quoted as criticising high crime rates and the drinking habits of young people in London.

With the vote now decided, the British media can expose their own double (low) standards with the type of border-line xenophobia we have come to expect of the red-tops.

The Daily Mail said that the World Cup decision has “sparked a bitter new ‘Cold War’ with Russia”.

Nice choice of phrase there.

Póg Mo Goals friends at the Guardian took a rather different approach on their Front Page.

Cheer up Becks, at least England didn’t go out on penalties.”

While Early Doors on eurosport.co.uk were magnanimous in defeat.

It is a pity we lost, but no disgrace. There will still be a World Cup. We can still travel to watch it, or we can view it on our TVs. And when all is said and done, we can still get knocked out by Germany.”

As ever, web posters were quick to let their feelings be known, and the difference of opinions were as wide and inhospitable as the Siberian landscape, and as heated as any Qatari (yet to be air-conditioned) football ground.

It’s no longer about football, but developing the world. Sepp Blatter obviously has a vision, if not visions. Most of us call it senile dementia.”

Just think, Qatar is just about to build a new stadium. They will refurbish three and build nine new ones; that means practically the whole population of Qatar 1.7million could watch a football game at the same time.”

Other chose to see the bright side of England’s loss.

At least we can all get laid for a fair price in Russia, instead of the muffin-top slappers that populate the streets here.”

While, as usual in England, club-loyalties were never far from people’s thoughts.

Of Russia and Arshavin’s success: “An Arsenal player has won something.”

The consiracy theorists were also quick to air their rather more radical views.

Beginning of the end. India wins 2026 bid even without having a football team that could compete in the Solihull Under-11 league. The UK to become 51st State following bankruptcy of the European Union. Brits cast their votes for President in 2028. David Cameron first British-born President in 2032. Fails to prevent annexation of Alaska by the Chinese Empire and the secession of California under 85-year Arnold Schwarzenegger. Germany win the World cup for the fifth time in 2034 after USAUK fail to make finals.”

This may have been written by Jim Corr.

While one poster summed up his ire succinctly:

Blatter hurry up and die.”

Yes, the English are hurting over this, and it’s all the more painful because they have no easy target on which to pin the blame.

The so-called Three Lions of David Beckham, David Cameron, and Prince Willaim have been given an easy ride so far.

But for many observers, there is a bitter taste in the mouth and a feeling of humiliation that the Prime Minister was forced to shmooze and grovel to the sleazy overlords of football’s shady governing body.

Even worse for the English was the sight of their future King prostrating himself before the likes of Septic Blatter and his fellow Sith Lords.

We’re pretty sure they meant William, not Becks.

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